New Residence is getting older: How long before the name is a lie? (Humour)

Thursday, September 11th, 2014
NewestResidence_RGB_JeffSmyth

September 2014 marks an exciting anniversary for Memorial University’s aptly titled “New Residence,” which celebrates its second anniversary of being open to students this year. However, with the unceasing forward march of time, the New Residence will continue to grow older until it is no longer, as its name implies, “new.” But how long does […]

 

Rotten Tomatoes consensuses of my childhood home movies (Humour)

Wednesday, September 10th, 2014

Birth (1992): Raw, visceral, and uncompromising, Birth is a fearless and in-your-face piece of filmmaking, as well as a promising debut for its young star. 89% First Steps (1993): Boasting a confident narrative and a wholly captivating performance from its lead, this is an assured sequel with few missteps. 94% Opening Birthday Presents (1996): The […]

 

Delusions of Adequacy: An important statement from city council candidate Richard Thornton

Saturday, April 5th, 2014

My name is Richard Thornton, and as many of you know I am currently running for a seat on your city council in the upcoming municipal election. Over the past month I’ve been hard at work campaigning for your votes, and while the campaign has been a predominantly rewarding experience, it has also been fraught […]

 

A year in wisecracks 2013-2014

Friday, April 4th, 2014
YearInReview_CMYK_JeffSmyth

Talking about how quickly time passes is a bit like opening a conversation with an unoriginal comment about the weather. Although clichés like this make for bland writing, they usually only become clichés because they represent almost universally-felt sentiments. Indeed, the 2013-2014 academic year seemed to come and go before we could blink. But looking […]

 

Student union interferes with MUN Smash Bros. Group

Tuesday, April 1st, 2014
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Hello everybody, I hope you are all doing well. Unfortunately, I have some very dismal news to share with you all today. MUNSU has contacted me this morning to issue a cease and desist toward our Smash group for playing the community-drive modification version of Super Smash Bros. Brawl called Project M. Although Project M […]

 

MUN Course Suggestions

Monday, March 31st, 2014

Memorial University is a good post-secondary institution. Like all respectable universities, it offers a fairly wide variety of courses—credits no doubt imperative for a successful post-university career. While there’s a lot to offer there is also a fair bit that it skimps on. Here are some classes I heard are being offered at the world’s […]

 

Delusions of Adequacy: Look, I don’t see what the big deal is here

Monday, March 31st, 2014

Look, I don’t see what the big deal is here. Yes, it’s true; I went out for a walk in the woods this morning. And sure, I got lost in thought and wasn’t really paying attention to where I was going. And fine, I’ll admit it, I may have accidentally gotten my left leg stuck […]

 

Delusions of Adequacy: Album reviews from a guy who doesn’t know what a CD player is

Tuesday, March 25th, 2014
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Nevermind: Nirvana – Three Stars This album is provocative and eye-catching from the first glance. Featuring a picture of a fully naked baby on the front is guaranteed to turn some heads, but the album designers known as “Nirvana” are clearly not afraid to court a little controversy. I give it three out of five […]

 

The Numbers 1-10, Ranked From 1-10

Monday, March 10th, 2014

The Numbers 1-10, Ranked From 1-10 1: Three. I’m putting three at the top of my list because it’s a sturdy, respectable number. From the number of primary colours to the number of legs on a tripod, three is safe, reliable, and dependable. 2: One. I’m going to get flack for putting it this high, […]

 

Hi, I’m the guy who can’t stop humming in agreement with everything the prof says

Tuesday, March 4th, 2014

Hi! I’m that guy! The one with serious medical condition preventing me from just shutting the heck up for longer than 45 seconds during any given class? You know me! Sure, I could stop at answering every question with a smug familiarity suggesting I see the prof as my equal and the rest of you […]